So we're over half a year into Obama's Presidency, and we can see that all going "oh so very well." You know that a President has lost their zing when the tabloids start running stories on their "Gay Cover-Ups." We'll see what else happens in the course of his term, and we'll also see if these out of the park theories on his being the Anti Christ come true. Hoorah.
I noticed today that one of the only things in life that I can't seem to go without is Mac N Cheese. Here's why: Two nights ago I made the last box of good Mac N Cheese (Kraft). There was one box left of the kind that I found out tasted nothing like Mac N Cheese. It was some weird brand from the Mexican Market across the street. Sorry Mexico, you have squat on America when it comes to Mac N Cheese.
This box of Mac N Cheese was HORRIBLE. Well, for lack of something else to make for dinner, I ended up eating anyway, but not without a bunch of additives: basil, oregano, salt, twice the butter, 1/4 of a block of cheddar cheese, and a whole lot of milk on the side to wash it down with. Case in point: I will eat Mac N Cheese one way or another.
So I went to sleep. I got up in the morning and ate some cereal and remembered that I had no more Mac N Cheese left. There were a few other things in the cupboard to eat for dinner, so I made a (hard) decision to not go and buy more. Well, the day went on and my lack of Mac N Cheese issue would not leave my head. I then realized that I had an addiction. Mac N Cheese were my cigarettes. I could not live without it. So off I went, to the store.
Now the other funny thing about me is I'm frugal with my money when it comes to small things like boxes of Mac N Cheese. I refuse to buy Mac when it's a dollar or more. I can't make myself come to buying it. It's SO WEIRD. So for example today I went to Vons (because sometimes they have great sales, and it isn't very far away). They were on sale for $1 each. I almost died. If they were 98¢ I probably would have bought a couple. Well, no worries, there was a Savemart across the street. They too, were "on sale" for a dollar a box. Now this was getting serious. I had NO intention of paying a dollar or more for a box of Mac N Cheese. Then I remembered Wal Mart, just down the street.
Now. The Wal Mart "just down the street" has got to be the lamest Wal Mart I have ever been to. Everyone and their Chulos, Bruthahs, and white trash uncles are there - WITH their food stamps. I swear I'm probably one the select few who do not own a single food stamp who shops at that particular Wal Mart. After I had navigated through the sea of people talking in different languages (yes, we're still in the US), I find the Mac N Cheese isle. 50¢ a box. MY WAIT WAS OVER. I grabbed a few and headed to the front of the store.
Here's where my patience gets tested the most.
Not only do the people in line have food stamps, they also have coupons, and pay the change with pennies. If they happen to have a $100 bill, they will at times use that, but only when the cashier is unable to make change. Then, for some reason, the customer claims "that is all I have" when they probably have enough food stamps to choke a small rhinosauras. The cashier then must turn on the blinky light switch and wait for their supervisor to come over and help them. There is a whole LIST of other Wal Mart experiences that I will post at a later time.
So I wait in line for about 15 minutes. I'm the second in line. The people in line were already there before I was standing in line. They were just buying diapers. The lady behind the counter looked annoyed and the lady standing in line looked like she just woke up from a long trailer trash hoe-down at the nearby rv park. I don't judge, I just observe.
30 minute after entering the store, I exit with my Mac N Cheese and pack of gum. Yes, the sneaky pack of gum. The ONE grocery item that you never have on your list the seems to slip it's way onto the belt every time you're standing in the checkout counter. Whoever invented chewing gum and then decided to display it at the front of the store by the register was the most genius man alive. He should die happy if he hasn't already.
The thing about my Mac N Cheese is that I have no plans on making it tonight. I just know now that I can be at peace knowing that I can, at any time, open the cupboard door and see that I can make myself a box of Mac N Cheese. It's about the principle of it all, I swear.
